, to see if you have full access to this publication.
Book Titles No access
Stop Caretaking the Borderline or Narcissist
How to End the Drama and Get On with Life
Authors:
Publisher:
2013
Summary
People with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorders have a serious mental illness that primarily affects their intimate, personal, and family relationships. Often they appear to be normally functioning at work and in public interactions, and Narcissists may even be highly effective, in the short term, in some work or social situations. However, in intimate relationships, they can be emotional, aggressive, demeaning, illogical, paranoid, accusing, and controlling—in the extreme. Their ability to function normally or pleasantly can suddenly change in an instant, like flipping a switch. These negative behaviors don’t happen once in a while, they happen almost continuously in their intimate relationships and most often, and especially with their Caretaker family member.
Here, Margalis Fjelstad describes how people get into a Caretaker role with a Borderline or Narcissist, and how they can get out. Caretakers give up their sense of self to become who and what the Borderline or Narcissist needs them to be. This compromises the Caretaker’s self-esteem, distorts their thinking processes, and locks them into a Victim-Persecutor-Rescuer pattern with the Borderline or Narcissist. The book looks at the underlying rules and expectations in these relationships and shows Caretaker’s how to move themselves out of these rigid interactions and into a healthier, more productive, and positive lifestyle—with or without the Borderline/Narcissistic partner or family member. It describes how to get out of destructive interactions with the Borderline or Narcissist and how to take new, more effective actions to focus on personal wants, needs, and life goals while allowing the Borderline or Narcissist to take care of themselves. It presents a realistic, yet compassionate, attitude toward the self-destructive nature of these relationships, and gives real life examples of how individuals have let go of their Caretaker behaviors with creative and effective solutions.
Keywords
Search publication
Bibliographic data
Copyright year
2013
ISBN-Print
978-1-4422-2018-8
ISBN-Online
978-1-4422-2019-5
Publisher
Rowman & Littlefield, Lanham
Language
English
Pages
219
Product type
Book Titles
Table of contents
ChapterPages
Contents No access
1 Is My Partner Really a Borderline or Narcissist? No access
2 Why the Borderline/NarcissistNeeds a Caretaker No access
3 What Is a Caretaker? No access
4 Caretaker Involvement Levels No access
5 Emotional Distortions of Caretakers No access
6 Thought Distortions of Caretakers No access
7 Behavioral Distortions of Caretakers No access
8 Distortions in the Sense of Self No access
9 Relationship Distortions of Caretakers No access
10 Stages of Healing No access
11 Challenging the BP/NP Family Rules No access
12 Beginning to Heal: Embracing New Beliefs and Behaviors No access
13 Increasing Your Self-Confidence No access
14 Nurturing and Caring for Yourself No access
15 Anxiety-Reducing Skills with the BP/NP No access
16 Change-Creating Skills with the BP/NP No access
17 Leaving or Staying No access
18 Moving Forward in a Healthy Way No access
19 Reaching Out to Others No access
20 The New You No access
Appendix: Caretaker Test No access Pages 199 - 202
